Life is Short
Paul Graham argues that life is actually short, not just finite, using the discrete nature of time with young children as evidence. He suggests relentlessly pruning bullshit (unnecessary meetings, arguments, bureaucracy, online fights), actively doing what matters, and savoring time. He advises not to wait to climb mountains or visit mothers, and to be impatient about important things. The tone is personal and philosophical, with practical advice for time management and life priorities.
January 2016 Life is short, as everyone knows. When I was a kid I used to wonder about this. Is life actually short, or are we really complaining about its finiteness? Would we be just as likely to feel life was short if we lived 10 times as long?
Since there didn't seem any way to answer this question, I stopped wondering about it. Then I had kids. That gave me a way to answer the question, and the answer is that life actually is short.
2016年1月 生命短暂，众所周知。小时候我常常对此感到好奇：生命是真的短暂，还是我们只是在抱怨它的有限性？如果我们的寿命延长10倍，我们还会觉得生命短暂吗？
由于似乎无法回答这个问题，我便不再想了。后来我有了孩子。这给了我回答这个问题的方法，答案是：生命确实短暂。
Having kids showed me how to convert a continuous quantity, time, into discrete quantities. You only get 52 weekends with your 2 year old. If Christmas-as-magic lasts from say ages 3 to 10, you only get to watch your child experience it 8 times. And while it's impossible to say what is a lot or a little of a continuous quantity like time, 8 is not a lot of something. If you had a handful of 8 peanuts, or a shelf of 8 books to choose from, the quantity would definitely seem limited, no matter what your lifespan was.
有孩子让我学会了如何把连续的量——时间——转化为离散的量。你只有52个周末和两岁的孩子一起度过。如果圣诞节的魔力从3岁持续到10岁，你只能看到孩子体验它8次。虽然无法说时间这样的连续量是多还是少，但8次不算多。如果你手里有8颗花生，或者书架上只有8本书可选，这个数量显然很有限，无论你的寿命有多长。
Ok, so life actually is short. Does it make any difference to know that?
It has for me. It means arguments of the form "Life is too short for x" have great force. It's not just a figure of speech to say that life is too short for something. It's not just a synonym for annoying. If you find yourself thinking that life is too short for something, you should try to eliminate it if you can.
好吧，生命确实短暂。知道这一点有什么不同吗？
对我来说，这很有意义。这意味着“生命太短，不值得做X”这种论证具有强大的力量。说生命太短不值得做某事，不只是一种修辞手法，也不仅仅是对厌烦的同义表达。如果你发现自己认为生命太短不值得做某件事，你就应该尽可能把它消除。
When I ask myself what I've found life is too short for, the word that pops into my head is "bullshit." I realize that answer is somewhat tautological. It's almost the definition of bullshit that it's the stuff that life is too short for. And yet bullshit does have a distinctive character. There's something fake about it. It's the junk food of experience. [1]
当我问自己，我认为生命太短不值得做什么时，我脑海里冒出的词是“bullshit”。我意识到这个答案有点同义反复。几乎可以说，bullshit的定义就是生命太短不值得做的那些东西。不过，bullshit确实有其独特的特征：它带点虚假。它是体验中的垃圾食品。[1]
If you ask yourself what you spend your time on that's bullshit, you probably already know the answer. Unnecessary meetings, pointless disputes, bureaucracy, posturing, dealing with other people's mistakes, traffic jams, addictive but unrewarding pastimes.
There are two ways this kind of thing gets into your life: it's either forced on you, or it tricks you. To some extent you have to put up with the bullshit forced on you by circumstances. You need to make money, and making money consists mostly of errands. Indeed, the law of supply and demand ensures that: the more rewarding some kind of work is, the cheaper people will do it. It may be that less bullshit is forced on you than you think, though. There has always been a stream of people who opt out of the default grind and go live somewhere where opportunities are fewer in the conventional sense, but life feels more authentic. This could become more common.
You can do it on a smaller scale without moving. The amount of time you have to spend on bullshit varies between employers. Most large organizations (and many small ones) are steeped in it. But if you consciously prioritize bullshit avoidance over other factors like money and prestige, you can probably find employers that will waste less of your time.
If you're a freelancer or a small company, you can do this at the level of individual customers. If you fire or avoid toxic customers, you can decrease the amount of bullshit in your life by more than you decrease your income.
如果你问自己，你花在什么bullshit上，你可能已经知道答案：不必要的会议、无意义的争论、官僚主义、装腔作势、处理别人的错误、交通堵塞、上瘾但无益的消遣。
这类事情进入你生活的方式有两种：要么是强加给你的，要么是诱骗你上当的。在某种程度上，你不得不忍受环境强加的bullshit。你需要赚钱，而赚钱主要由杂务组成。事实上，供求规律确保了这一点：某种工作越有回报，人们就越愿意低价去做。不过，强加给你的bullshit可能比你想象的少。总有一些人选择退出默认的苦差，去往传统意义上机会更少、但生活更真实的地方。这可能会越来越普遍。
你也可以在不大动干戈的情况下，在更小规模上做到这一点。你花在bullshit上的时间因雇主而异。大多数大型组织（以及许多小型组织）都深陷其中。但如果你有意识地将避免bullshit置于金钱和声望等其他因素之上，你很可能找到更少浪费你时间的雇主。
如果你是个体经营者或小公司，你可以在个别客户的层面上做到这一点。如果你解雇或避开那些有毒的客户，你减少bullshit的程度很可能超过你减少的收入。
But while some amount of bullshit is inevitably forced on you, the bullshit that sneaks into your life by tricking you is no one's fault but your own. And yet the bullshit you choose may be harder to eliminate than the bullshit that's forced on you. Things that lure you into wasting your time have to be really good at tricking you. An example that will be familiar to a lot of people is arguing online. When someone contradicts you, they're in a sense attacking you. Sometimes pretty overtly. Your instinct when attacked is to defend yourself. But like a lot of instincts, this one wasn't designed for the world we now live in. Counterintuitive as it feels, it's better most of the time not to defend yourself. Otherwise these people are literally taking your life. [2]
但是，虽然一定量的bullshit不可避免地强加给你，但那些通过诱骗潜入你生活的bullshit，只能怪你自己。然而，你选择的bullshit可能比强加给你的更难消除。诱骗你浪费时间的东西一定非常善于欺骗你。很多人熟悉的一个例子是网上争论。当有人反驳你时，他们在某种意义上是在攻击你，有时相当明显。你被攻击时的本能是自我辩护。但和许多本能一样，这个本能不是为我们现在生活的世界设计的。尽管感觉反直觉，但大多数时候不辩护更好。否则，这些人实际上是在夺取你的生命。[2]
Arguing online is only incidentally addictive. There are more dangerous things than that. As I've written before, one byproduct of technical progress is that things we like tend to become more addictive. Which means we will increasingly have to make a conscious effort to avoid addictions — to stand outside ourselves and ask "is this how I want to be spending my time?"
网上争论只是偶然上瘾。还有更危险的事情。正如我以前写过的，技术进步的副产品之一是我们喜欢的东西会变得越来越令人上瘾。这意味着我们将越来越需要刻意努力避免上瘾——跳出自我，问自己“这是我想要花时间的方式吗？”
As well as avoiding bullshit, one should actively seek out things that matter. But different things matter to different people, and most have to learn what matters to them. A few are lucky and realize early on that they love math or taking care of animals or writing, and then figure out a way to spend a lot of time doing it. But most people start out with a life that's a mix of things that matter and things that don't, and only gradually learn to distinguish between them.
For the young especially, much of this confusion is induced by the artificial situations they find themselves in. In middle school and high school, what the other kids think of you seems the most important thing in the world. But when you ask adults what they got wrong at that age, nearly all say they cared too much what other kids thought of them.
除了避免bullshit，还应该主动寻找重要的事情。但重要的事情因人而异，大多数人需要学习什么对自己重要。少数幸运儿很早就意识到自己热爱数学、照顾动物或写作，然后找到方法花大量时间做这些事情。但大多数人的一开始的生活是重要和不重要的东西的混合，只有逐渐学会区分它们。
尤其是对年轻人来说，这种困惑很大程度上是由他们身处的虚假情境引起的。在初中和高中，其他孩子对你的看法似乎是世界上最重要的事情。但当你问成年人他们在这个年龄做错了什么，几乎所有的人都说他们太在意其他孩子的看法了。
One heuristic for distinguishing stuff that matters is to ask yourself whether you'll care about it in the future. Fake stuff that matters usually has a sharp peak of seeming to matter. That's how it tricks you. The area under the curve is small, but its shape jabs into your consciousness like a pin.
The things that matter aren't necessarily the ones people would call "important." Having coffee with a friend matters. You won't feel later like that was a waste of time.
区分重要事物的一种启发式方法是问自己：未来你还会在乎它吗？虚假的重要事物通常有一个尖锐的峰值，看起来似乎很重要。这就是它欺骗你的方式。曲线下的面积很小，但它的形状像针一样刺入你的意识。
重要的事情不一定是人们所说的“重要”。和朋友喝杯咖啡很重要。你以后不会觉得那是浪费时间。
One great thing about having small children is that they make you spend time on things that matter: them. They grab your sleeve as you're staring at your phone and say "will you play with me?" And odds are that is in fact the bullshit-minimizing option.
有小孩的一大好处是，他们迫使你把时间花在重要的事情上：他们自己。当你盯着手机时，他们会抓住你的袖子说：“你会陪我玩吗？”而很可能这恰恰是减少bullshit的最佳选择。
If life is short, we should expect its shortness to take us by surprise. And that is just what tends to happen. You take things for granted, and then they're gone. You think you can always write that book, or climb that mountain, or whatever, and then you realize the window has closed. The saddest windows close when other people die. Their lives are short too. After my mother died, I wished I'd spent more time with her. I lived as if she'd always be there. And in her typical quiet way she encouraged that illusion. But an illusion it was. I think a lot of people make the same mistake I did.
The usual way to avoid being taken by surprise by something is to be consciously aware of it. Back when life was more precarious, people used to be aware of death to a degree that would now seem a bit morbid. I'm not sure why, but it doesn't seem the right answer to be constantly reminding oneself of the grim reaper hovering at everyone's shoulder. Perhaps a better solution is to look at the problem from the other end. Cultivate a habit of impatience about the things you most want to do. Don't wait before climbing that mountain or writing that book or visiting your mother. You don't need to be constantly reminding yourself why you shouldn't wait. Just don't wait.
如果生命短暂，我们应该预料到它的短暂会让我们措手不及。而这正是往往会发生的事情。你把事情视为理所当然，然后它们就消失了。你总想着可以以后写那本书、爬那座山，或者其他什么，然后你意识到窗口已经关闭了。最悲伤的窗口关闭是当其他人去世时。他们的生命也很短暂。母亲去世后，我希望当初能多花时间陪她。我活得好像她会永远在那里。而她以典型的安静方式鼓励了这种错觉。但这只是错觉。我想很多人都犯过和我一样的错误。
避免措手不及的通常方法是时刻意识到它。在过去生活更不稳定的时代，人们对死亡的意识程度到了现在看起来有点病态的地步。我不确定为什么，但似乎答案不是不断提醒自己死神在每个角落徘徊。也许更好的方法是换个角度看问题。养成对最想做的事情不耐烦的习惯。不要等，去爬那座山、写那本书、看望你的母亲。你不需要不断提醒自己为什么不应该等待。不要等就是了。
I can think of two more things one does when one doesn't have much of something: try to get more of it, and savor what one has. Both make sense here.
How you live affects how long you live. Most people could do better. Me among them.
But you can probably get even more effect by paying closer attention to the time you have. It's easy to let the days rush by. The "flow" that imaginative people love so much has a darker cousin that prevents you from pausing to savor life amid the daily slurry of errands and alarms. One of the most striking things I've read was not in a book, but the title of one: James Salter's Burning the Days.
It is possible to slow time somewhat. I've gotten better at it. Kids help. When you have small children, there are a lot of moments so perfect that you can't help noticing.
It does help too to feel that you've squeezed everything out of some experience. The reason I'm sad about my mother is not just that I miss her but that I think of all the things we could have done that we didn't. My oldest son will be 7 soon. And while I miss the 3 year old version of him, I at least don't have any regrets over what might have been. We had the best time a daddy and a 3 year old ever had.
当某样东西不多时，我还能想到两件事：努力获得更多，以及珍惜已有的。这两点在这里都适用。
你的生活方式影响你的寿命。大多数人可以做得更好，包括我。
但你可能通过更加留意你拥有的时间来获得更好的效果。日子很容易匆匆流过。富有想象力的人如此热爱的“心流”有一个阴暗的表亲，它阻止你在日常杂务和警报的泥浆中停下来品味生活。我读过的最令人印象深刻的东西不是一本书，而是一本书的标题：詹姆斯·索特（James Salter）的《燃烧的岁月》（Burning the Days）。
时间是可以放慢一点的。我已经变得更擅长这一点。孩子有帮助。当你有小孩时，会有很多完美到让你无法不注意的时刻。
感到自己已经从某段经历中榨取了所有东西，也是有帮助的。我怀念母亲，不仅仅是思念她，而是想到我们本可以做却没有做的那些事。我的大儿子很快就要7岁了。虽然我怀念他3岁时的样子，但我至少对可能失去的时光没有任何遗憾。我们度过了爸爸和3岁孩子最美好的时光。
Relentlessly prune bullshit, don't wait to do things that matter, and savor the time you have. That's what you do when life is short.
无情地剪除bullshit，不要等待去做重要的事，珍惜你拥有的时间。这就是生命短暂时该做的事。
[1] At first I didn't like it that the word that came to mind was one that had other meanings. But then I realized the other meanings are fairly closely related. Bullshit in the sense of things you waste your time on is a lot like intellectual bullshit.
[2] I chose this example deliberately as a note to self. I get attacked a lot online. People tell the craziest lies about me. And I have so far done a pretty mediocre job of suppressing the natural human inclination to say "Hey, that's not true!"
Thanks to Jessica Livingston and Geoff Ralston for reading drafts of this.
[1] 起初，我不喜欢想到的这个词还有别的含义。但后来我意识到其他含义也相当密切。浪费时间的bullshit和智力上的bullshit非常相似。
[2] 我特意选择了这个例子作为给自己的提醒。我在网上经常受到攻击。人们散布关于我最疯狂的谎言。而到目前为止，我在抑制人类自然的“嘿，那不是真的！”倾向方面做得很一般。
感谢Jessica Livingston和Geoff Ralston阅读了本文的草稿。